It’s confession time. My time to confess, that is. I’ve spent the last week positively crawling out of my skin, energy wild and erratic. This happens every so often, but this time was off the charts. Nothing would settle me. I tried going for a walk, grounding, eating a heavy meal, meditating, taking a nap, reading, watching Netflix. I even tried cleaning my kitchen in a last-ditch effort to prove to myself that I could actually complete a task. Result: half-cleaned kitchen. I couldn’t find relief and I wracked my brain to try and figure out what was going on. Hormones? Astrological tail-spin? Solar flares? Low blood-sugar? Existential crisis? No, No, No, No and maybe….
The truth is that there was really nothing “wrong” and that’s what I want to convey to all of you. The truth is that the unsettled feeling that we all get in the pit of our stomachs is sometimes just gas. But other times, like today, its the feeling of standing on the precipice, of feeling the event horizon of something extraordinary. That feeling doesn’t mean you have to “DO” anything. You just have to “BE” and allow the giant tidal wave of amazing universal energy to wash over you. This can be hard to do, trust me. My mother used to tell me that I had an “Uber-A” personality. Sitting still and letting stuff happen isn’t exactly my forte. Nor, am I guessing, is it for any of you (we’re friends for a reason, after all).
And so the crawling, crazy, slightly manic feeling doesn’t need medicating or analyzing or fixing. You have been the architect of your life the whole time and it’s been moving forward at a maddeningly beautiful pace (I can feel some of you start to object – so let me stop you and say that it absolutely HAS). That feeling of not knowing what to do, and not knowing what’s next isn’t cause to chuck the whole thing in, its time to pause and look at this amazing feat and all of the things that you’ve created. And in that space of reflection, you can find peace.